By ZoE
Date: 17 July 2000
Fiercly
It's not so easy to be definite
it is not so easy to sleep without
thrashing and tumbling
through blankets
when you lose the glow
it is so hard to get back
as you grow old
your bones quiver as you walk
and it is hard to live without these
beautiful things to look forward to
but Jesse, these are only your throbbing dreams
They are not so special
They are just like everyone elses
Esther, you said to crack the eggs
you said not to get any eggshells in the bowl
but it was just as hard to do as it is for me
to think of what I fear:
living without love
just living
but living without love
my palms, Christopher says
show the branches of the loves
I will have
only 2
some people have 10
but some have not one
I don't want vericros veins
or pollen in my sinuses
or love that feels like thorns
cut me open
cut the tomatoes precisely on the cutting board
and Gary still likes the smell of
my marlboros burn
the spaces where we realize
we could never love eachother
he could forever forget
to tell me
how
he fears me
firecly
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