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By Misti Date: 2001 Sep 19 Comment on this Work [[2001.09.19.12.58.32153]] |
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Her heart was pounding. Her stomach was swarming with a plague of butterflies. Her face was burning. This was it. Mildred licked the excess Pearly Gates of Heaven lipstick off her front teeth and banged on the door with her fist. A dog yelped on the other side of the door. "Hush, Zarathustra. Calm down. No one's going to get you," a male voice said. The door swung open. There he was. Charlie. "Can I help you?" he asked with guarded eyes. "I hope so. It's me, Charlie. Mildred Carlson." "Mildred? Well...come on in." "You look much better than the pictures you e-mailed me. Your nose doesn't look so bad in person," Mildred said. "Well, thank you. I think. You look much better in person, too." Zarathustra, a tiny white Maltese, barked ferociously at Mildred. "Zarathustra. I've heard all about you," Mildred murmured with a smile. "I wasn't lying, was I? He truly is deranged. Come...let's sit on the sofa and talk about...things. Like...for instance...how did you find me? And...uh...excuse my limited grasp of the English language at the moment...but what are you doing here?" "You're shocked. I can see that you're shocked." "Well...yeah. I guess I am. I wasn't, uh, expecting you." "But you know me! We've bonded these past five months. You know me better than my sister does! And she's known me since I was a baby!" "So...you drove here all the way from Iowa?" "No, I just flapped my wings and flew. Of course I drove here. In my trusty Ford Granada. It was fun, though. I listened to the Coltrane and Miles Davis cassettes that you recommended." "Mildred...I don't know how to say this so I'll just say it. I'm not ready for this. I thought I made that clear to you." "But you wrote poems about me. Eleven poems. Eleven poems about me. Remember the one you e-mailed me less than twenty-four hours ago? 'Literally, lyrically, luckily I am in love with you.' Please don't tell me you weren't being literal. Because I took it very literally. I haven't slept since I read it. I feel fifteen again! I look in the mirror and see a wrinkled face and silver hair. But inside I feel like I'm blooming all over again! It's springtime inside me! I stared at the moon last night thinking of you seeing the same moon here in Louisiana." "Oh, Mildred. I'm so sorry. I don't know what to tell you. I thought you were charming. I enjoyed flirting with you. I love your insights and your sense of humor and your enthusiasm. But this is progressing way too fast for me. You know I'm still recovering from the divorce. How did you find me?" "I did some detective work. It wasn't that hard. I'm burning up. I can hardly breathe. I feel like I'm going to pass out." Mildred closed her eyes and leaned back into the orange and brown sofa. "I'll get you some water. Just relax." Charlie left the room. Tears trickled from Mildred's eyes. She wiped them away and looked down at Zarathustra, who was eyeing her suspiciously from across the room. "I'm crazy, Zarathustra. Crazy for crying. Crazy for trying. And I'm crazy for loving your master," Mildred intoned. Charlie returned with a glass of water. He handed the glass to Mildred and sat down beside her. "Thank you. Ice cubes. Nice touch." Mildred sipped the water. Charlie patted her knee. "I really am sorry, you know. I had no idea you took our Internet flirtation so seriously," Charlie said. Mildred studied Charlie's young, handsome face. She saw sincerity and sensitivity shining in his strange blue eyes. Mildred smiled wistfully. She ached with tenderness and adoration. "I must suppress all of this. It's time to cauterize, count my losses and get back in my car," she told herself with resignation. "I never wanted to hurt you, Mildred," Charlie said softly. "I know, Charlie. I know. I didn't want to freak you out. I thought by coming here today I'd make you realize, somehow, that we truly were meant to be together. I was hungry for love and so eager for what I thought you had to offer. But you know what? I don't regret anything. It was a pleasure knowing you through your e-mail and poetry and those late night ICQ chats. And it was a pleasure meeting you in person. But I'll be going now. Good-bye, Charlie. Keep being careful." Mildred put the glass down on the coffee table and headed for the door. "You don't have to leave. You could stay the night," Charlie offered as he followed Mildred to the front door. "No. I couldn't. It wouldn't in any way resemble what I so wanted. To spend the night in your arms and to awake to your love tinged smile. What I did today was crazy, certainly. But as old and foolish as I am, I still have my dignity and my ideals. So long, Charlie. I love you and that is real." Charlie stood in the doorway and watched Mildred get in her car. She waved as she drove away. Charlie waved his hand in a daze. |