By RainbowChaser
Date: 2002 Dec 29
Comment on this Work
[[2002.12.29.01.42.9103]]

Enabler

Enablers allow their lovers to tear them apart
but somehow never comprehend
that all this pain is somehow their responsibility to bear
the cost of loving someone too much

I've enabled you to treat me this way
to cast all your burdens upon me
and to never consider how much this affects me
how my mind labors endelessly on your strife

I didn't lie when i said i would give it all up
i would allow you to take all my material possesions
if it would make you happy, even for a split second
but there i go again..enabling you

it's hard on me to tell you no
when i think that i may hurt you
so much so that you won't want to be near me, to love me
don't run from me, run to me

How is it that I constantly become the one that nurtures another
but i'm left behind in their struggle for life
I've given you all my breath, my heart, my soul
and you've taken it all, and left me with barely enough to survive

You want to put me down
to hurt me
to punish me
for imaginary offenses

the only offense that i've committed is loving you
i've believed in your heart, in the way i feel about you
to an almost fault
but it doesn't make me a bad person, or a person unworthy of your love

you seem so harsh with me sometimes
but somehow through all my pain
i've developed the capacity to overlook my pain
and to instead focus on your happiness

i know that i can never make you completely happy
no one can
no one can complete your life
until you decide to take the steps to allow someone to love you

I"m the enabler that allows you to experience everything on your own terms
i'm there when you need a mental, physical, or even social fix
i run to you, with a first aid kit, cookies, and a smile
you take what i offer, then offer me nothing

i do these things because i want to
because i care about your more than anything in the world
material possesions are nothing compared to your love
you completed me in such a short time, now there is a void that is irreplaceable

i've always believed that when god closes a door that he opens one
but in this case, he's not only shut a door, but also taken the keys to all the other doors
you are my dream come true
and this is an inescapable nightmare

I'll stop enabling you
if you start appreciating me
you must change, too
it isn't all me

I"ve done all that i can for you
yet, you're still not satisfied
like my mother, and countless others before her
you continually depend on me for your will

But, I can't do it anymore
I'm not responsible for your survival
it's not that i don't love you
it's that i love you so much, that i want to stop enabling you to keep your love away from me