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By Misti Date: 2004 Aug 04 Comment on this Work [[2004.08.04.20.42.20544]] |
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down again because here I am ragged and broke and living in a doll room again as was predicted and my boyfriend can't remember when to call me so I call him with the last minute on the calling card he sent me because I am crazy with insecurities and need to hear his laugh and that goes as well as can be expected and I call my bank and find out that the hour I spent in the fucked up Wells Fargo branch was wasted they have no record of my new name even though they made copies of my divorce decree and new driver's license and I am training to be a tech support geek for Dell even though I can't tell cookies from cache and I tell my mom I am going crazy and need to get away and Texas is the worst place for me and she says the devil is attacking her, too and there is nothing to do but pretend I'm lobotomized like Frances Farmer and don't know enough to give a fuck about my lack of luck and twice a week therapy sessions with a fine Christian doctor from the UK who tells me my way hasn't worked sleeping about with men outside of marriage drinking and carrying on like a wild woman it is time to be tamed learn a new game play by the rules even when the rules make no sense and winning no longer matters. |