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By Misti Date: 2005 May 21 Comment on this Work [[2005.05.21.13.20.487]] |
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Ninety degrees at sunset and Jojo wanted to screw. The AC was not working. Jojo was blasting "Aneurysm" from the stereo. Andromeda was on the rag and Jojo had eaten the last brownie. This is it, Andromeda thought to herself as Jojo bounced up and down on the waterbed hoping that would turn Andromeda on. It is time to cut my losses and get the hell outta here. After six years of on again off again mediocre sex and various addictions (video games and weed for Jojo, mostly shopping at the dollar store and speed for Andromeda) Andromeda was ready to put on her flip flops and walk out the door. So she did. ********************************* Corinthia stood shakily and faced the congregation in her wrinkled Thrift Town dress. "Hello, I'm Corinthia. That isn't the name I was born with. I named myself after my favorite book in the Bible after a clown named Martini led me to the Lord. I was fed dog food as a child and beaten with various flyswatters. I ran off and joined the circus at twelve. By thirteen I was a speed freak. By fourteen I was an alcoholic. Then Martini told me Jesus loved me. I believed her. So here I am." The congregation shouted out,"Amen!" And "God is Good!" Later that night Corinthia was dunked in water. ********************************* Roscoe had a troubled employment history. His first job was at Subway. He was fired after two hours because he put too many pickles on the sandwiches. Next he worked in a call center taking orders from lingerie catalog customers. Roscoe was unable to talk his customers into spending over a hundred bucks on their orders so he only lasted six months. Then Roscoe worked in a preschool. He told the children about tornadoes and Elvis dying on the potty. He was fired after three weeks. At that point Roscoe broke down and walked into an employment agency. They put him to work stuffing envelopes. Roscoe now has an apartment and a pet ferret. |