First let's talk smells. 
  Today people worry about their rights and freedoms. 
  Some want more. Some want less. I'm more concerned that 
    they're taking away our individual smells. 
  It's terrible. 
  There's a spritz or a spray for everything. Under the arms. 
    In the nose. In the crotch. You have no idea who you're 
    talking to anymore. You don't know the difference between 
    men and women. Everybody smells like a strawberry. You 
    walk past a fruit stand and get hot. What the hell is that? 
  That's no way to live. 
      --The 2000 Year Old Man