From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=676">Cyan</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

keven urenda~ I love <a href="/blend/wv.cgi?id=2002.08.19.17.19.11059">more on dreaming</a> Don't know exactly why. I just do. Lovely.
<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=16">kevin urenda</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

Cyan...<BR>
Thank you.
<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=23">Kirk</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

Hopefully the Blender-Keeper won't mind me workshopping some haiku here rather than on the ... oh, right.<BR>
<BR>
Anyway, here's a small piece I wrote in 1999. I worked a long time to get the balance right:<BR>
<BR>
empty dorm room; <BR>
two red earrings <BR>
by the unmade bed <BR>
<BR>
Just for a lark, I decided to try for the traditional 5-7-5 form:<BR>
dark empty dorm room; <BR>
two red with silver earrings <BR>
by the unmade bed <BR>
<BR>
Any thoughts? Or suggestions for that troublesome middle line?<BR>
<BR>
The image is very personal to me; a girlfriend travelled to visit me over her spring break during college, she left those behind, and it seemed (and seems) a very sexy thing for her to have done, considering why they were removed...<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<BR>

<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=620">Varda</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

Hey Kirk,<BR>
<BR>
I like that haiku, and I'm a fan of the formal (atm). ;) Something you might want to try is rearranging it a bit and use "unmade" as a play on words... the bed was unmade, but maybe you were too? ;) Anyway, I liked it very much as it was. Very visual. :)<BR>
<BR>
*V*<BR>

<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=620">Varda</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

Just wanted to pass on the dictionary's meaning of "unmade"(format slightly altered), because it almost sounded submittable. ;)<BR>
<BR>
*V*<BR>
<BR>
un·make   Pronunciation Key  (n-mk)<BR>
tr.v. un·made, (-md) un·mak·ing, un·makes <BR>
<BR>
1. To cause the ruin of; destroy. <BR>
2. To alter the nature or characteristics of. <BR>
3. (of a bed) not having the sheets and blankets <BR>
   set in order; "an unmade bed with tangled <BR>
   sheets and blankets"<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
 *smile* nice, eh?<BR>

<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=620">Varda</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

I should just think before I write, and then maybe I'd get all these posts into one nice message.... anyway...<BR>
<BR>
it doesnt matter ~ I really like 'tremble'. Not only the words are great, but also the way you set them up to be seen and spoken. I am on my way to read more by you right now. :)<BR>
<BR>
*V*<BR>
<BR>
PPPS, I swear: Kirk, I just wanted to thank you for having us. I'd never be sharing my poetry if it weren't for this place! :))
<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=5">jackryhme</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

red silver earings removed?<BR>

<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=4">TJ Holland</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

Kirk,<BR>
<BR>
Maybe "two red with silver earrings" could be "with two silver red earrings". It's not as precise, but it's more poetic. <BR>
<BR>
 <BR>

<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=900">RennieLorca</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

<BR>
ditch "two" (can be redundant) and try working it with just red earrings in variations ..... Rennie
<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=5">jackryhme</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

dusk, empty dorm room<BR>
red silver earrings remain<BR>
scatterd sweaty sheets<BR>
<BR>
lol last one kirk ...promise<BR>
<BR>
jack
<HR>
From: <a href="/blend/av.cgi?id=717">zero love</a><BR>
Date: 22 August 2002<P>

kirk~~ do u ever write poetry?
<HR>